December 27, 2010

Unfinished Object


I found a box from my grandma on my porch last week. Inside was this very long scarf, and a note from my grandma saying that my aunt had knit it for me.


That was sort of heartbreaking, because my aunt died unexpectedly two months ago.

The scarf is comfortingly warm. I started wearing it that day. At some point I buried my face in it. It smelled like her house, and I cried in a way that I hadn't yet cried since she died.

Grandma found the scarf still on the needles, waiting to be cast off. She cast off, wove in the ends, and sent the scarf to me. She included the remainder of the skein (Berroco "Lavish") and these ribbons, some of which my aunt had intended to attach to the ends.

It has me wondering those sorts of questions that never get answered when someone dies. Did she not know how to cast off? Was she stuck about whether to use the ribbons? Or was it her continual struggle with depression that kept her from taking those last finishing steps?

Knowing the scarf was done for a year, but that I never got to thank her and compliment her on her knitting just feels terrible. And it has me looking around at my own unfinished objects as well. Why haven't I completed them? Where am I getting stuck? I don't necessarily know. I want to be better about this. I'm not really into resolutions but I just want to be more mindful about completing my projects and getting them on to their intended purposes.

20 comments:

Jan said...

How lovely to think you have something very special from your aunt that was made just for you . . . and she probably knows how happy you are with her efforts. My 'resolution' is to start making my Christmas gifts very early next year - and complete them, but will I really?

Melissa said...

What a bittersweet gift. It looks so cozy.

I've been trying to analyze why I get stalled on certain projects. I'm interested to see if there's a pattern. Good luck with your UFO's!

Sewjournal said...

How lovely that you have this scarf and that someone took the time to finish it and to give it to you instead of just giving to charity as a UFO.

Jessica said...

beautiful story. i have a small pouch UFO, (hand pieced tumblers finishing at 1.5" tall) that I started making for my grandmother in 2003. I have tried several times to finish it but someother project always makes me push it aside. Her 83rd birthday is next month.. maybe i should just finish it before it's too late. thank you.

Quiet Quilter said...

Sometimes there are questions cannot be answered. It is nice that your grandmother could finish it enough to send it to you...what a great gift to remember your aunt by.

marilyn said...

I look at all of my projects that way as well. Sometimes it gets overwhelming with all of the ufo's I have around hereand makes me want to just throw them all away and start from scratch! But I'm too thrifty for that and then I get bogged down with which ufo to begin with and the cycle begins again. I guess I will just have to live forever.

Cara said...

What a lovely reminder of your Aunt's love.

Dolly said...

How touching........this was your big heartbreak this year, wasn't it? So sorry for your loss, and for the hard time that she lived through. Depression is SO SERIOUS.....I've been there, and it's a hard hole to climb out of.
Praise the Lord,
HE sent me help in the form of a wonderful therapist who unknowingly led me back to HIM.

I understand the feelings this has brought up in you. A situation that I'm living through has me wondering about the things I start, and the things I haven't yet finished. It's funny how certain things seem to just turn on a light, huh?

Bless you Christina........so glad that you have that scarf now.

Sarah Craig said...

It's a beautiful scarf, and I know you feel close to your aunt when you wear it.... I like to believe that she knows how much you love it, and her!

Mama Pea said...

Oh, that's so lovely. I am so sorry about your aunt, but I am so glad you have this wonderful thing she made for you. I have taken to wearing scarves all day, too, because they are so warm. My mom sent me a scarf she made me for Christmas, too. I just love it. I am glad you have something like that to wrap yourself in and to comfort yourself. I lost my best friend a few weeks ago and am still struggling with that. Wish I could give you a big hug right now. Sending you a virtual hug.

Quiltdoodles said...

I am sorry about your aunt. What a sweet and thoughtful thing your grandma did for you and for your aunt.

Regina said...

Wow - thought provoking in so many ways. Thanks for sharing this.

Melissa said...

What a great thing to have the scarf your aunt intended for you! It is a mind boggling mystery to see in objects left behind, how life can suddenly cease in the middle of so many things in progress. But it was cool that your grandma picked it up where your aunt left it...hope you are hanging in there.

Patchwork and Play said...

What a lovely story! Thank you for sharing it. Yes, it is important to finish things, especially if they are for gifts!

Bobbie B said...

what beautiful treasures you have ... your scarf .... your grandmother and your memories of your aunt ....
thank you so much for sharing your story with us ...

dls said...

I teared up reading about your aunt..... thank you for writing this post. Enjoy your special scarf.

Shasta said...

How sweet of your aunt to think of you and make the scarf for you - and your mother for finishing it. I agree with you. I need to be more mindful about completing things as well. My family would have no idea what to do with my incomplete projects.

SewHappyGeek @ excellcrafts said...

OOooh, I just love your blog! the free motion quilting tutorials have really helped me feel more confident and daring with my quilting! also wanted to let you know I linked to you in a 'useful links' post today - let me know if it's a problem and I'll take it off! Thanks so much!

Tabitha said...

I think it's actually kind of neat when I find stuff like that. There's something hopeful about feeling there will still be time to finish projects. I think it's a tribute to finish her scarf--the crafters I know would be honored. Either way, it's a wonderful thing to remember her with!

Trish said...

I am glad that you have the scarf and that your Grandmother sent it to you! I agree, why do we have so many things unfinished. I, too, am trying to stop holding onto unfinished items. We will work together and keep on getting things done. A big hug coming your way. Just keep remembering all the great things about your aunt!

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